We Would Be Dead

You Have to Want it (The Tragedy of JonBenét Ramsey)

"People ask me all the time how I think of such dark stories every week. Well, I say, I just take any scenario and think of the worst possible outcome. It’s there if you want it, but you have to want it."
This week we take a look at a crime that captured a nation. The murder of 6-year-old "beauty queen" (their words, not ours) JonBenét Ramsey. The murder that has dominated the covers of tabloid periodicals ever since the day it happened, all the way back in December of 1996. A beautiful, wealthy, 6-year-old girl brutally murdered in her own home on Christmas night while the rest of her family slept in their beds... or did they? The worst part about this story is that we know very little, the rumors are many and the facts are few, and so, it remains unsolved. So who killed her? Why bring such a violent end to such an innocent little creature? Well, we can give you all the credible information available, but what we can't give you is an answer. You'll have to decide what you think yourself... but be careful, your answer could say more about you than it does about the crime.  
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Helpful hints for holiday family stress
 
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Dear Diary (Joel Michael Guy Jr.)

For most of us, our childhood home is a sacred place; it holds our memories, our daydreams, our secrets. It's a place where we learned and grew and discovered who we were. Your childhood home should radiate safety especially, around the holidays. It should be a place that appears in your dreams and photographs for the rest of your life. It should never be the scene of your worst nightmare come to life. That is, unfortunately, exactly what the Guy family of Knoxville, Tennessee, had to face. Just after spending a wonderful thanksgiving together, Joel and Lisa were brutally murdered in their home. 
On Monday November 28th, 2016, The Knox County sheriff's department was called in to do a wellness check on 55 year old Lisa Guy and her husband Joel, but what they found has gone down in history as one of the worst crime scenes imaginable. The officer's who found Joel and Lisa could only describe it as "A diabolical stew of human remains". What kind of monster could do this you might ask? Only one who was very close to home, a monster that one could say, hid under the bed... A monster that Joel and Lisa spent 28 years caring for... their son.
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Thankful for you (30 minute ThanksKilling)

The holiday season has come upon us yet again, and to kick it off, we thought we would give you all a special treat. In Honor of this day of thanks we decided to hold the true crime and serve up a heaping helping of insanity. We hope you enjoy our recap of, what it is in our opinion, the best of the heartwarming holiday classics about a murderous turkey. Patrons have had access to this one for a whole year, but because it was so fun and so nuts we decided to give it to you all free of charge. Don't worry though precious patrons, you're still getting something extra, a 30 minute ThanksKilling 2 is coming at you this month! We are so very thankful for all of you, enjoy this wild gravy soaked ride and we'll be back with a new case next week! 
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Ravenous (Swift Runner & The Wendigo)

"The Wendigo lives in the most frightening of places, a place from which there is no escape. Once the Wendigo awakens, it tears through this place with unimaginable patience and force, creating a path of nightmares, and consuming everything it sees. It is a place so close and familiar, yet so mysterious and difficult to explore that only a fraction of it is known to humankind. "
This week we explore North America's most famous folkloric monster, The Wendigo. We discuss it's human origins and the kind of world that created it. This episode is a deep dive into a monster with surprisingly real and deep roots, culminating in the true story of an horrific event. The wendigo is an extremely fascinating and blurry line between fantasy and reality and we're still not sure what to think of it. Perhaps the scariest thing about a Wendigo is that it is impossible to tell whether it is real, or just a figment of the imagination. Either way, this monster leaves a trail of destruction unlike any other cryptid. 
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Leslie‘s Revenge (Alien Stuff)

This week, Leslie gets her revenge by scaring the bejesus out of Holly with her worst fear: aliens abducting humans and probing them. On December 26th, 1985, at a secluded cabin in upstate NY, Whitley Strieber, his wife and son headed to bed early after a lovely day spent sledding and enjoying Christmas dinner leftovers. Hours later Whitley would wake up in the middle of the night and his whole life would change forever. Unfortunately, it would take weeks and months for him to remember what exactly happened that night. With the help of several doctors, including a hypnotist, Whitley would discover that his lost time, terrifying flashbacks, and painful ailments were caused by something out of this world.
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The Amityville Horror House (10/30/2021 LIVE show)

On November 13th 1974, in the quiet village on Amityville NY a horrible tragedy befell the residents of 112 Ocean Avenue. A tragedy that many would say set into action a dark presence that resides within that house to this day. In this live episode we tell the story of the DeFeo Family murders and Lutz family hauntings. We take a deep dive into the Amityville horror house and the events that inspired countless books, movies and documentaries. This is a live show so there will be noise from the crowd at some points, but we think that adds to the fun! Hope to see you all at future live events in a city near you!
 
*Recommended Documentary "My Amityville Horror" can be found on Amazon Prime. 
 
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The Denver Spiderman (Theodore Edward Coneys)

 Halloween is right around the corner, and everyone is entitled to one good scare. This week we decided it was Leslie's turn, so Holly is bringing us all a tale of mysterious murder, a shadow figure, things that go bump in the night, and the most terrifying home invasion yet... all of Leslie's least favorites. We don't want to reveal any more in the description, as that would spoil the twists and turns that this story is famous for. Just listen, and maybe sleep with the light on. Happy Halloween!
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The Blood Countess (Countess Erzsébet Báthory)

Hundreds of murdered girls. Bath tubs filled with blood. Torture, mutilation, cannibalism, and some of the most nightmarish imagery we have come across to date, this weeks tale has it all. Join us for a trip into war torn medieval Hungary where you will hear the story of perhaps the most prolific serial killer of all time, a woman who's obsession with youth and beauty was only outweighed by her lust for blood. Countess Erzsébet Báthory has inspired countless legends and tales including Bram Stoker's Dracula, but in this case, the truth may be ever more terrifying than fiction.
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Based on a True Story (A Nightmare on Elm Street & Candyman)

Time for a little spooky season fun, fiends! This week we tell you the terrifying true stories behind the classic horror films A Nightmare on Elm Street and Candyman. Hope you all sleep well tonight!
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Original Chicago Reader article
 
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Journey‘s End (Gabby Petito)

On September 11th, 2021, 22-year-old Gabby Petito was reported missing. Photos, posters and desperate pleas to find the young blond-haired, blue-eyed traveler began to take social media by storm. Gabby had gone on a cross country road trip with her fiancé Brian Laundrie; Brian had returned from trip in her van, eleven days prior, alone. Even more confusing, he refused to speak to the police. As the whole world watched with bated breath, a strange story began to unfurl that ended in Gabby's death and the furious manhunt through the United States for Brian that is raging on to this day. In this episode, we will break down the copious information circulating about this up-to-the-minute case. Then, we will finish with an interview with mental health professionals Andrew Jarema and Jess Sprengle. We discuss the reality of mental illnesses that have attached themselves to this case as buzzwords, the influence social media has on our self image and relationships, and what exactly life might have been like for Gabby and Brian in that van. At the end of the day we were all left to wonder, how could something like this happen? I know we can't answer that question, but we have given you all the information possible to try. 
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